Buy a Binky for Donald!

OK, the truth is that I, as a one of those elitist, left wing liberal, rational secular humanists, am as dismayed as every other one of my similarly minded friends over the election of Donald Trump as our 45th President. But I’ve got an idea to express our huge sense of foreboding about what’s coming while maybe effecting some positive change in the man’s abysmal behavior..

Let’s start with a description of he who would be our fascist leader. Supremely experientially and temperamentally unqualified for office, racist, anti-immigrant, willfully ignorant, lacking of any understanding of the country’s founding principles, pandering, mendacious, misogynistic, loaded with conflicts of interest, amoral, and, to the point of this little essay, drowning in infantile narcissism. Yup, that’s most of it.

Trump reminds one of a spoiled, bullying brat with a skin so thin (and orange, apparently) that he cannot tolerate even the slightest criticism without lashing out like a petulant, infantile  adolescent  with unrestricted access to social media. Nothing escapes his tweeted outrage. Most recent example: Meryl Streep at the Golden Globes, eliciting this rude imbecility, “…a Hillary flunky who lost big,” and  the gratuitous dig, “…one of the most over-rated actresses in Hollywood.”

So, what do we do with an oversized, whiny, bullying pea-brain whose tantrums seem uncontrollable? Well, I’ve been a pretty good parent in my lifetime, if I do say so myself, and I’ve learned that when babies get really irritable and can’t be otherwise controlled, all that nervous energy can usually be dissipated by sucking. And based upon all the available evidence, Donald Trump is a baby who sucks big. Ergo, my new campaign, which I’ve chosen to call “Buy a Binky* for Donald”.

Given that the guy’s lack of self-control is a manifestation of extreme immaturity, excess nervous energy, and deeply seated insecurity (not uncommon in bullies), why not let him stuff a Binky into his pie hole to suck his way into more socially acceptable behavior? To accomplish this, we should, each and every one of us, send him a pacifier so he’ll have a “huge” supply, say, enough to carry him through his impeachment. After all, if he’s going to act like an out of control and immature sociopath, let’s treat him like one. You can send it to him at Trump Tower. I’ve given the address, below.

BUY A BINKY FOR DONALD!

Send a Binky to Donald at:

President–Elect Donald J. Trump, Trump Tower, 721 Fifth Avenue, New York, NY  10022

* Binky is the registered trademark of  Edgewell Personal Care Brands, LLC.

 

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